Tale of a Red-Nosed, Well-But-Slightly-Overdressed Reindeer

Last Christmas, Nana's dear friend Miss June gave Chaos a Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer toy.  You squeeze the ear on the toy and it sings "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer."  Not really, but I wish.  Just kidding Mom and Nana.  You, too, Mommom T.  Really, just kidding.  Stop returning my Christmas presents!
Me, being the Scrooge that you all love and tolerate, tends to gleefully pack up any and all Christmas crap paraphernalia the moment I can pry it out of Jason and the kids hands, congratulate myself on surviving the holidays and swear that I'm going to Vegas next year.  Because of my need to pack up everything even remotely Christmas-related, Bree had forgotten about Rudolph and was tearfully reunited with this wonderous toy recently.  Hand to God, on my honor, not making that up.  It's a shame soap operas are dying out because my Bree can over-act like nobody's business.

Unfortunately for Rudolph, the reunion involved a make-over and a new name.  Rufus.  Seriously.  Bree has taken to calling the poor toy Rufus and no one is going to make her believe otherwise.  And Bree really likes to accessorize poor Rufus.  I have taken to calling him/her "Rufus, the-cross-dressing, perhaps-a-transvestite, reindeer." 

Jason has a more "Toy Story"-esque theory.  He thinks that as soon as Bree falls asleep, Rufus disrobes, heads downstairs for a Guinness, lights up a cigar and spends the rest of the night cursing about Bree to all of the other toys in a gruff, husky, three-pack-a-day habit-y sort of voice.  And trust me, according to Jason, he/she is NOT saying very pleasant things about Bree.  And you all thought that Jason was the "good" parent.

xoxo
Deb